Waiting...

Well, we have been waiting for a long time now. Now that our referral is imminent it's hard to believe that we have been waiting so long. I am not quite sure how we have survived the waiting, mostly with lots of support from families and friends and also with lots and lots of activities. When we first expected our referral around May/April of 2006 we thought we would plan a vacation around the middle of the wait so that we would have something to plan and look forward to and then by the time we got back we would rush into packing and travel mode - ha, man makes plans and God scoffs! We went to Hawaii in March of 2006 and it was fantastic and beautiful. We had never been before and had a wonderful time (apart from a near drowning experience - a tale we'll leave for another day). We saw wonderful whales, did an incredible snorkle trip, did the road to Hana and also went to the Big Island where we stayed in Volcano National Park and saw the active volcano - amazing. Then of course, no referrals were coming but we kept busy with lots of socializing. I also took up knitting in the winter as a beginner and finally finished a sweater - for the baby! Now I am knitting her a second cardigan - who would have guessed! I also started volunteering at The National Zoo with the Cheetah Conservation Station. I went through some vigorous training and now act in a docent capacity talking to the public about Cheetah conservation, Grevy's zebra, Maned Wolves, and Scimitar Horned Oryx (a species that is extinct in the wild but exists thanks to successful captive breeding). I have loved this work at the zoo and have had some incredible behind the scenes opportunities as well as a chance to travel with some volunteers to Patuxent Wildlife Refuge to see the highly endangered Whooping Cranes and the attempts to breed them and teach them to migrate as part of Operation Migration. David spent lots of time with me at the zoo and got some great pictures over the summer, particularly of the Orangatuns on the "O" line. We also had some great sightings of the Golden Lion Tamarins which they have in a free-range area in the zoo during the summer - so cool. We also had a fair amount of work travel and that kept us busy and occupied. In November, we went to CA to celebrate the wedding of David's brother and had a wonderful time seeing lots of special people. By this time we were going pretty stir crazy with the wait and needed to plan something exciting to help tide us over again. I was keen to go to South Africa again but David needed a new country so we went to Tanzania. It was FANTASTIC! We flew to Nairobi and caught a bus to Tanzania where we were met in Arusha by our guide with Sunny Safaris. It was just me, David and our driver for the next seven nights - well, and plenty of fabulous animals too. We had a glorious time and also met two terrific couples who we have kept in touch with, and one of which we spent at their fabulous New Years party. We went to Tarangire Park - lots of great elephant sighting, went to the Serengeti, to Ngorongoro Crater and finished in Lake Manyara. All beautiful and wonderful. Highlight was the cheetah in Ngorongoro crater and lions mating in the Serengeti but it was all superb. Got back in time to deal with holiday craziness, New Year happened, and we were also coping with everything that had to be redone due to expiring paperwork because the wait was so long! We had to renew our fingerprints which are only good for 15 months (everyone knows that your fingerprints change right, ha!), we had to update our home study which meant visiting with the social worker again - she is very nice, providing the home study agency again with employment letters, financial statements, DMV records, Police and Child Abuse clearances and updated medical reports! It was like doing the whole thing all over again! Also, the extremely important I171H was going to expire on March 26, 2007 and it has to be valid through the completion of travel - it only lasts for 18 months from initial date so we had to do another I600A application - pay the $545.00 fee again and then wait and wait for the new approved I171H to come again. This is a whole separate saga to say the least. Our current status on that is that we received the new form but it had the wrong date on it. I was advised that a new one would be mailed 9 days ago - not yet received. What I did receive was a copy as a Word document e-mailed to me - rather odd. However, it's correct so I am keeping it although we have asked that a copy still be mailed. So, that brings us to current day where we're dying of excitement, barely able to control our emotions and desparate for the referral. The most recent update which came with a big exclamation and said Referral Update and got me all excited but it basically said that CCAA is matching and that perhaps referrals will be sent next week. This is the sweater I made. We are going to add a link here to a few favorite zoo pictures - coming soon.

Rumor Queen

What would a Chinese adoption blog be without a mention of Rumor Queen? We were ignorant in the beginning about the glories (and pitfalls) of the constant quest for knowledge about any possible rumour coming out of China with regards to referral dates, how many LID dates would be given referrals, when were TAs (travel approvals) come etc. Not to mention the wealth of information about books to read, things to buy, attachment, bonding, packing lists etc. In April we started gathering with five other couples from this area who were all with our same agency and who had approximately the same LID dates. Four couples actually have the exact same LID date. This group of people, and another couple who joined the group later have all been a wonderful source of support because nobody knows it like those going through it. We have been meeting with these couples monthly since April of 2006. Anyway, they introduced us to Rumor Queen. I avoided it at all costs. My goal was to do as much as possible to make the wait go as fast as possible and not go crazy with every little murmur. However, David became quite a fan and of course kept me updated on every little nuance :-). Anyway, here is a kudos to Rumor Queen because it is an amazing resource.

The room is starting to come together!

We have been working hard to bring the room together - one can't believe how hard it is to decide where to place a crib! I was very excited about a project I did for her room where I painted an old chest of drawers. Thanks to our friend Kathy who gave us this design tip, we now have lilac and white striped drawers.

Our friend Ellen made us the beautiful curtains for the room and with the extra fabric she made us a divine little quilt - her talent never ceases to amaze me. She and her husband are our same LID date with the same agency and so we plan to all be going to bring our girls home together. Their daughter's room has beautiful quilted carousel horses everywhere! The zebra, giraffe and elephant swag hanging above the curtains is very special. We gave this to our long time friends Marty & Laurie when their son Connor was going to be born. Connor is going to be eight this year! Marty & Laurie then had Aidan who is now five and he has just decided that he wants a big boy room and so Laurie passed the swag back to us - a very sentimental touch to have come around full circle.

We can't control ourselves when it comes to books so her bookshelves are filling up rapidly. Since we both love to be in Africa and seeing wildlife is one of our favorite things to do, we decided to mostly do her room with african animals as well as some pictures of non-african animals. Hopefully, this will rub off on her and she'll be a fan of wildlife too. I know that her daddy intends to take her to the zoo a whole lot.

Chinese New Year and our Pets

We celebrated Chinese New Year on February 18, 2007 by going to Chinatown in Washington, D.C. with our friends. Chinese New Year is the biggest holiday celebrated among Chinese people. Often referred to as the spring festival. Chinese years are grouped in sets of 12 with each year being represented by an animal. It is said that a person displays the characteristics of the animal of the year in which they were born. This is the year of the pig! Our daughter is likely born in the year of the dog, which was last year. I too was born in the year of the dog. Our attributes are that we are responsible, gracious and loyal. It is appropriate that she will be born in the year of the dog since she will join a house with Caleb ("Calabby") our lab and Egan, our Irish Setter. She will also have a cat named Sparkle and a horse called Dan.

We look forward to finally meeting our daughter at the end of the red thread. After waiting for nearly two years since we made the decision to adopt from China, we are finally only weeks away from meeting our baby! We can hardly believe that we will soon see her for the first time...

These Chinese characters mean adoption :

Common Traditions & Terms Found in the Chinese Adoption Community

* Ladybugs - Believed to be good luck in the adoption community.
* Dossier - The set of documents that represents the adopted family. It includes the medical reports, birth certificates, employment verification letters, police clearances, financial statement, home study, etc.
* DTC - Dossier to China. This is the milestone day when the Chinese government logs in the receipts of a dossier to adopt a child. This represents the end of the "paperchase" for the adoptive parents, and the beginning of "the wait" for a referral of a child by the Chinese government.
* LID - Log in date. This is the date that CCAA logs in your dossier on arrival in China. Our LID is 10/28/05
* CCAA - China Center of Adoption Affairs. That's where the dossiers are processed and the children, who live in China's SWI's (Social Welfare Institutions) and/or foster care, are matched with families.
* Referral - Notification from the CCAA that they have matched a family with a child. Referral information usually includes the child's Chinese name, date of birth, height/weight, a medical report, one or more photographs, and a few notes about the child's nature.
* TA - Travel Approval. This is received when China gives the family Travel Approval to come to China to bring home their child.
* HS - Home study. A home study is done by a licensed social worker who says whether a family is capable of adopting a child.

Why are Chinese girls predominantly adopted?

China is a country whose culture dates back to the earliest records known to man. At first glance, some of China's beliefs may seem quite different than those we hold in the western world. One example of this is the cultural preference for a male child. There are several reasons why Chinese families might prefer a boy over a girl. In rural provinces, a family's livelihood depends directly on the output of its family members. Because of this, a family with sons would be at a considerable advantage than one with daughters. Historically, it is also the son's honored responsibility to take care of his parents in their old age. A daughter, however, would be expected to care for her husband's parents rather than her own. In this regard, the Chinese believe that having a son is crucial to their livelihood, as well as a form of social security for the parents when they grow older. Although in recent years, China has done much to change these belief systems, many families, especially in rural areas, still strongly favor the birth of a male child. This situation is further complicated by China's One-Child Policy, which prohibits families from having more than one child. As a result of this policy, there are thousands of abandoned children throughout China, with the vast majority of them being healthy girls. (Courtesy of America World Adoption Association)

Our Story

As with many families, we have been on a very long journey waiting for our baby. For a long time we have wanted to be parents. We started our adoption jouney in 2004. We decided early that we wanted to adopt a daughter from China and quickly settled on GWCA as our adoption agency. We contacted GWCA on May 19, 2004 and received an application from them on June 3, 2004. We were approved by them on June 7, 2004. At that time people were receiving their referrals for their babies within a short time frame - around 6-8 months. To find out more about the infamous Dossier process we went to New Jersey in on October 23, 2004 for an East meets West conference put on by the agency. This was very useful as we find out a lot about the home study process and the daunting paper trail process to complete the Dossier. After that time we started to work on gathering our paperwork and choosing a homestudy agency. The paperwork involved in the dossier could be its own single blog. We had to both have physicals, have Virginia police clearances and child abuse clearances, we had to have letters of references (thanks to our dear friends who wrote such heart warming letters that touched my heart), we had to have letters of employment, we had to proffer all our personal financial history, we needed birth certificates, wedding certificates and DMV clearances for the homestudy. We had to have a homestudy which comprised of four visits from a social worker including an inspection of the home. We also had to be fingerprinted. Once each of these documents were obtained they had to be notarized, then certified by the State Department and then taken to the Chinese Consulate for authentication - lots of seals and lots of money. We also had to submit to USCIS (previously INS) an I600A application to petition to adopt an orphan child. We finally received the last document that we had been waiting for - the I171H which was the USCIS approval of our petition to adopt. Once we received this document in early October 2005, we ran it around to get all appropriate seals and then we put the whole dossier together and sent it off to GWCA on October 7, 2005. The Dossier was mailed to China on October 14, 2005 and we then received our official LID (log in date) of October 28, 2005. We have been waiting since then to hold this precious and much wanted and needed child in our arms. The original referral period starting lengthening right before our LID date and the child that we first thought we would receive by summer of 2006, we now hope to bring home in summer of 2007 but she will be the perfect child for us. We thank every one of family and friends who have so wonderfully help us survive this painfully long wait. This little girl is going to be so loved!!

Rou Rou's parents Shelli & Jason helped us create our first website. Thank you so much!