What a crappy day. We have been hit emotionally right out of the ballpark. As mentioned at the end of last week we had been starting to hear rumors about the cut off for referrals being 10/26/05. We tried hard to remain optimistic but our agency confirmed this to be true this morning. My emotions ran from numb to shear emotional exhaustion, anger and perhaps now some acceptance of the news - we have no choice at all but to regroup and focus on the fact that we will soon have our daughter. Our day can be characterized by the pictures, dark clouds, scowling sun with shadow, sad face, and then perhaps 1/2 a happy sun and 1/2 a sad sun. We remain really thankful for our blessings - supportive and loving family, fabulous friends and our fellow 10/28'ers from our group with whom we plan to share a few "beverages" soon. We know that so many people wait with us for this child and we thank you all for your loving support. We hope that next month will truly be our turn. After total elation at the start of last week, we are cautious about being certain about anything, but when we are matched, it will be with the perfect child for us.
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I think we all ran that gamet of emotions! Now we are bracing ourselves for a June Referral so if 10/27 is as large as they say we wont feel the impact as hard if they only do one day. We are in this for the long haul and our turn will come soon! We are planning fun stuff to keep our minds off the wait!
Ellen
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